9 Personality Tests That Lead Moms to Enlightenment

Personality testing may be the single most effective resource in helping me to accept myself. 

I ‘came out’ as an introvert a few years ago.

Before taking the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI), the word introvert wasn’t even in my vocabulary. 

When I finally connected the dots between what it means to be an introvert and the needs of an introvert, my world was turned upside down. 

So, what does introvert actually mean? 

“Introverts direct their energy inwards towards their inner, subjective world. They get their motivation from having time to themselves, and their batteries drain quickly when they are with other people even if they are enjoying the company. Introverts tend to have fewer friends and acquaintances, and find it harder to meet new people.”

“People with this preference tend to be deliberate, focused and questioning; thinking before they act. They learn by tuning into their own thoughts and feelings, and need their own territory to thrive.”

“Introverts may not enjoy impromptu social activities and can easily be over-stimulated if they spend too much time focusing on other people. They think deeply about things and seek to understand issues before forming a judgment on them. Their attitude is reserved and inquiring and they need to bake in periods for quiet reflection throughout the day.”

-Truity.com



So, being an introvert means that I need time to myself to function properly…that I will be drained by stimulation & socializing (opposite of extroverts)…and that I am naturally focused on deeper things…

Gosh, couldn’t someone have given me this personality test when I was little, so that I could show all of the adults in my life?!

It would’ve made my life so much easier to just give them this list & make it mandatory that they respect that this is just how I am.

Introverts:

*Feel worn out by too much socializing 

*Need plenty of time for themselves

*Are happy staying out of the spotlight

*Dislike small talk and will try to avoid it

*Prefer to get to know people on a deeper level

*Prefer to have a small circle of close friends

*Are often ‘in their head’ and require time to reflect on their thoughts, feelings and observations

*Have a quiet, reserved and thoughtful demeanor 

*Like to look before they leap

*Are self-aware

*Others may find it hard to get to know them

-Truity.com

It truly would’ve made my life a lot easier to not always have to qualify my preferences, feelings, needs, etc. 

Can you believe that I went about 20 years being completely oblivious that my ‘preferences’ were needs and not me just being lazy, arrogant, selfish or uncooperative?

OnBeing An Inconvenient Personality Type

I was treated as if I were arrogant because I didn’t want to make conversation w/ everyone, anywhere we went.

I was told to stop being lazy and apply myself when I was just overstimulated, overwhelmed and exhausted.

I was told that my desire to be with myself, by myself–in a big family of 7–was simply self-centered.

I was always treated like I was purposefully uncooperative, when I simply didn’t want to follow the crowd. 

All of my upbringing, I was being conditioned w/ overt and subtle messaging that told me that I was wrong for merely being myself.

(By the way, I have a good relationship w/ my parents, they did their best and I’m not blaming them for any issue I ever had. Talking about this stuff is how we grow/learn from it.)

So many memorable moments in my life have revolved around people getting upset for me just being me.

Aspects of my personality that were/are popular w/ the criticism:

  1. Objectivity (stating facts that people don’t like)

  2. Empathic abilities (I automatically absorb the feelings of those around me)

  3. Assertiveness (I say exactly what I mean)

  4. Emotional openness (honest, open emotional expression)

  5. Intuitive-oriented (belief in things there isn’t ‘evidence’ for)

  6. Irreverent (a true ‘punk’)

  7. Introversion (love being alone)


How my unique combo of personality traits has gotten me into trouble:

  • Someone asks me for my opinion and I told them my true opinion = I’m a jerk.

  • I get vulnerable in describing how hurt I am = emotionally manipulative.

  • I mishear someone and react to it = insensitive.

  • I tell people that I think something is objectively wrong = cold, inconsiderate.

  • I call someone out for saying one thing then doing another = bitch.

  • I ask someone what’s wrong based on facial expression or reaction = awkward silence.

  • I make hilarious shocking jokes = eye rolls.

  • I predict how relationships will unfold = ‘yeah….ok Bianca…’ (& then it happens haha)

  • I bow out from social situations = ‘what’s your problem?’ or ‘what are you sneaking away to go do?’

You might be able to tell that I’ve felt misunderstood during my childhood…and maybe still a little bit today.

If you’re like me and you’ve felt misunderstood a lot, I’m here for you, sis! 

Let me tell you how personality testing (& retesting) has made my life so much easier.

Moving On From Feeling Misunderstood

Personality testing has helped me to:

  • Accept myself

  • Understand myself

  • Truly love and adore myself for who God made me to be

  • Appreciate my qualities 

  • See my blindspots clearly & OWN those blindspots

  • Tune in clearly to my intuition

  • Uncover the path that’s meant for me

  • Get along w/ my husband better

  • Get along w/ my kids better

  • Design thoughtful and firm boundaries

  • Develop the ability to shift boundaries as needed

  • Talk to my parents about my childhood, needs & what was lacking

I want personality testing to perform the same way for you!

9 Personality Tests You Can Take to Feel Centered

Here are 9 powerful personality tests that’ll change your life, your self-image and your relationship to yourself (& thus, relationships to others).

Take these personality tests today (mostly free links attached):

  1. The Sovereign Matriarch Type Quiz

  2. MBTI

  3. Keirsey’s The Four Temperaments 

  4. Enneagram

  5. Clifton StrengthsFinder

  6. Hippocrates’ Four Temperaments Test

  7. The Four Tendencies

  8. The Color Code

  9. Big 5


But… what are these tests all about? 

Are they all the same? 

What do they measure? 

What’s the benefit of taking all of them?


They’re all very different. You may find similar aspects or themes amongst them but each test tells you something different about yourself.

Brief Overview of Each Test

1. The Sovereign Matriarch Type Quiz

My signature quiz uncovers how you mother based on your temperament (I used Keirsey’s Four Temps as the basis + framework of this quiz). We all have a primary natural temperament & it determines the way we react, behave and problem-solve. It’s crucial to know your Sovereign Matriarch type so that you know how to bring yourself back to center in the unpredictability of motherhood. 

2. MBTI

The Myers-Briggs Type Indicator is based on 4 aspects:

  1. Preference for focusing on your inner world or the external world. This is known as Extraversion vs. Introversion.

  2. Preference for focusing on the basic information you input or to  interpret that info and add meaning to it? This preference is represented by Sensing or Intuition.

  3. In decision-making, do you consider the logic first or the people involved? This dichotomy is: Thinking vs. Feeling.

  4. Preference for decisiveness or staying perpetually open to all options & potentially new info? This preference is called Judging or Perceiving.

The MBTI was the game-changer for me. Learning about introversion was life-changing in and of itself, but then also learning about my preferences for information, decisions and structure greatly increased my self-knowledge. 

There are 16 types in the MBTI & there is much similarity w/ Keirsey’s Four Temperaments. 

My personal results from this test: INxJ

Learn more about this test from the experts.

3. Keirsey’s The Four Temperaments

Keirsey’s conception of temperament is: “a configuration of observable personality traits, such as habits of communication, patterns of action, and sets of characteristic attitudes, values, and talents. It also encompasses personal needs, the kinds of contributions that individuals make in the workplace, and the roles they play in society. Each temperament has its own unique qualities and shortcomings, strengths and challenges.”

There are 4 temperaments: the Artisan, the Guardian, the Idealist & the Rational. These are intimately linked to your Sovereign Matriarch Type.

My personal results from this test: Idealist

Learn more about this test from the source that I quoted above…

4. Enneagram

“Each of the nine personality types is characterized by a set of dominant behaviors, motivations, and fears. The goal of this system is to better understand your Enneagram type so that you’ll be able to make the most of your strengths and address your weaknesses in order to achieve your full potential.

According to Enneagram theory, people are born with a dominant personality type that can then be shaped by environmental factors and experiences.

These two forces also tend to influence each other. While inborn traits and characteristics help shape how people respond to their experiences, their environment also plays a role in shaping how personality is formed and expressed.”

My personal results from this test: 8w7, The Nonconformist 

Learn more about this test from the source that I quoted above…

5. Clifton StrengthsFinder

This test measures your top 5 natural strengths that will make inferences about which types of work you would be best suited for and be naturally motivated by.

My personal results from this test: 

1) Connectedness 2) Command 3) Context 4) Intellection 5) Strategic

Learn more about this test from the experts.

6. Hippocrates’ Four Temperaments Test

“Hippocrates theorized that personality traits and human behaviors are based on four separate temperaments associated with four fluids (“humors”) of the body: choleric temperament (yellow bile from the liver), melancholic temperament (black bile from the kidneys), sanguine temperament (red blood from the heart), and phlegmatic temperament (white phlegm from the lungs)...

For example, the choleric person is passionate, ambitious, and bold; the melancholic person is reserved, anxious, and unhappy; the sanguine person is joyful, eager, and optimistic; and the phlegmatic person is calm, reliable, and thoughtful.”

My personal results from this test: Choleric + Melancholic

Learn more about this test from the source that I quoted above…

7. The Four Tendencies

“By asking the suspiciously simple question: ‘How do I respond to expectations?’ we gain explosive self-knowledge.

Our Tendency shapes every aspect of our behavior, so understanding this framework lets us make better decisions, meet deadlines, suffer less stress and burnout, and engage more effectively. The Four Tendencies explain why we act and why we don’t act.”

My personal results from this test: Rebel (can I make my life ANY harder? lol)

Learn more about this test from the source that I quoted above…

8. The Color Code

“The Color Code Personality Profile will not only help you recognize your innate strengths and limitations, but it will show you how to use those traits to excel in every part of your personal and professional life.

This personality profile tool reveals your intact, innate personality – there are four categories– and represents it as a color. Each personality emanates from a Driving Core Motive (DCM) unique to each of the four personalities. Using four personality “colors,” you can determine your own color and Driving Core Motivation, and that of others you interact with.

By understanding what motivates you and the people you interact with regularly, you can build more effective relationships. That’s why this is such a powerful tool for self-development, self-awareness, team effectiveness and team building.”

My personal results from this test: Red

Learn more about this test from the source that I quoted above…

9. Big 5

“While there seem to be unlimited personality variables, 5 variables stand out from the pack in terms of explaining a lot of a person's answers to questions about their personality: extraversion, neuroticism, agreeableness, conscientiousness and openness to experience.”

My personal results from this test:

  • Extroversion: medium

  • Conscientiousness: high

  • Openness to Experience: high

  • Neuroticism: high

  • Agreeableness: high

Learn more about this test from the source that I quoted above…



Previous
Previous

Moms Who Choose to Stay Home: Stop Treating Yourself Like a Second-Class Citizen in Your Own Family